Not quite a yo-yo

I need a daylight lamp.  I can't afford one, but I really need one. 

Today was a better day.  Not the greatest, but much better than all the days last week combined.  Dreas and I decided to go for a week to Tuscany in the beginning of May.  I spoke to A-n-C about it, and they are joining us.  We're going to get a mobile home (one that is stationary) for a good price, and we are going to have a ball.

I'm a little more positive today, and that is at odds with how negative I was feeling last week.  My moods are quite yo-yo-ing, but I feel up and down, and I really dislike feeling this way.  I know that I am slightly bi-polar, and I have the whole damn depression thing going, and I try to remind myself of that when I am in the pits of it.  The problem is when I am in the shadow of depression, I can't see the way out.  It hurts me.  It hurts me more knowing that it worries the people that love me.  I'm not suicidal this Winter, so I'm better off than I was last year.

I need to get back to a schedule again, and start eating properly.  I also need to start pampering myself again (hair, nails, skin, etc.), as that goes a long way toward making myself feel good.  If I look good, I feel good.  If I eat healthy, I feel good.  If I get out and walk for at least 15 minutes a day, I feel good.  I have the tools to help myself, but I tend to forget them, or ignore them when the depression hits hard.

As I said, today it better, and I am going to work at making tomorrow even better than today.